Setting Boundaries In Sobriety
Building Your Great Wall of Sobriety
Establishing boundaries is a significant part of sobriety. Learning how to define and set your boundaries in sobriety is essential to living a sober life after completing rehab. Learning how to create and maintain your boundaries is an essential part of sobriety. When you enter treatment at Resurgence Behavioral Health, we will help you identify healthy boundaries and teach you how to implement them in real-life situations.
Throughout the recovery process, you constantly rediscover that your prime responsibility is always to yourself. Boundaries can help you to define where your personal responsibilities end and others begin.
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What Are Boundaries?
We all have boundaries, whether we know it or not. What exactly are boundaries? Boundaries are what separates you from people, places, and things. Boundaries can be both verbal or physical divisions. It is what separates your identities, responsibilities, feelings, needs, and issues from other people’s.
Setting your own personal boundaries stops you from abandoning yourself. Prevents you from becoming trapped in a caretaking or constantly trying to fix other people. The most important part of boundaries in sobriety is to stop other people who attempt to control you by telling you how to think, feel, or behave.
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Why Are Personal Boundaries Important?
Boundaries are based on personal values and needs. They provide you a space to express yourself and what you value most. Boundaries in sobriety provide personal guidelines that help you to communicate with others. It establishing boundaries in sobriety help you define what behaviors are acceptable and unacceptable to you.
Establishing Healthy Boundaries
Setting boundaries in sobriety is an important step. You will learn what boundaries are and how to access them. If you have never established healthy boundaries this process may be more difficult especially if you are a people pleaser. Here are a few examples of what healthy and unhealthy boundaries can look like.
| Healthy Boundaries in Sobriety | Unhealthy Boundaries in Sobriety |
| Clearly expressing your wants and needs, responding respectfully when refused | Expecting others to read your mind or know what you want without saying so. |
| Saying no when you are uncomfortable | Accepting undesirable behaviors |
| Maintaining your boundaries and values no matter what others think. | Making others happy despite the personal cost to yourself |
| Thinking about the pros and cons of entering into a new relationship | Rushing into a new relationship impulsively |
| Treating yourself with respect and kindness | Talking negatively |
| Developing trust with people over time | Giving your trust to everyone or no one |
| Expressing and sharing your feelings with other people | Discouraging others beliefs, opinions, and feelings |
| Accepting responsibility for what you say, think, and actions | Taking the responsibility for someone else’s opinions, actions, and emotions |
How Do You Build Healthy Personal Boundaries?
Boundaries help you to deal with temptations. Defining your boundaries is easier said than done. The first consideration to establish healthy boundaries is to identify harmful influences that can put your sobriety at risk. These often include people, places, and things that remind you of your prior drug use. Determine if your boundaries are an appropriate part of the recovery process.
Setting boundaries is not always easy. However, not having boundaries when you are recovering can very easily lead to relapses. There are a few questions that you can ask yourself when establishing healthy boundaries.
- Does this make me feel angry?
- Do I feel like I am being used?
- Am I feeling violated?
- Do I feel resentful?
- Am I feeling isolated?
When you take an inventory of your current boundaries, you may learn that your boundaries are not firm enough. Setting boundaries may be a new experience and can be unsettling. However, setting boundaries in sobriety is important for long term recovery.
Develop a Plan
Once you have identified your boundaries, it’s time to develop a plan to handle situations where you will have to enforce them. Working with your addiction counselor or peer support members can help you develop a counter plan. This plan provides you with concrete enforceable actions that you can begin implementing immediately. For example, changing your phone number may be the best way to cut out unhealthy relationships.
Deleting phone numbers of people that you bought drugs from. Starting a hobby is another way to curb negative thinking. Remember to celebrate your achievements. Regularly taking the time to talk to peer support or your counselor about your progress helps you to remain accountable.
How Boundaries Support Sobriety
Establishing boundaries in recovery benefits you in many ways. Your boundaries will help you maintain long term motivation to stay in recovery. Setting healthy boundaries protects yourself from harmful relationships and safeguard your recovery. Although addiction cannot be cured, establishing boundaries can help prevent relapses.
Boundaries Reduce Temptations
Developing a healthy set of boundaries can help you resist the temptation that you will face during recovery. This may involve who you choose to spend your time with. It may include places that remind you of your past drug use. Avoiding purchasing items that may trigger negative thoughts. These are all effective boundaries that can reduce relapse.
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Finding the Strength to Say “No”
Learning to stand up for yourself and say no is difficult because most of us do feel a need to be accepted. However, this is an important part of creating healthy boundaries. Once you realize your self-worth and value saying no will become easier.
Boundaries Help You Improve Your Communication
Boundaries help you communicate without placing blame. You will learn how to recognize and express what you need in a relationship. Expressing your needs want and desires will help build lasting relationships.
Being Accountable
Learning to be accountable for your past actions is difficult. When you are in recovery you learn how to take ownership of your actions. Resurgence Behavioral Health can help learn how to love and respect yourself again by building boundaries in sobriety. Through this process, you can accept the consequences of your behaviors and choose to live a life of integrity and character.
Gaining Self-Worth with Healthy Boundaries
When you embark on the journey to becoming drug-free you will learn how to recognize your self-worth and efficacy. This is an important part of recovery. Many addicted individuals have very low self-esteem. Low self-esteem can lead you to make decisions that negatively impact your life and the lives of those around you. Setting boundaries help develop your sense of identity. It also helps you to respect yourself and others.
When you are establishing your boundaries it’s vital to listen to yourself and fully consider your feelings first, not what others think. Establishing healthy boundaries allows you to work on your feeling and move forward with your recovery. As you begin to develop an awareness of yourself you will learn to trust your intuition and feelings.
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Rehabilitation Solution
Resurgence Behavioral Health offers comprehensive addiction treatment. Our facilities provide you luxurious amenities that create a peaceful and relaxing environment so you can focus on your recovery.
At Resurgence Behavioral Health our philosophy is to accept people from all walks of life. We sincerely believe recovery is always possible. We will never judge you, only support your recovery journey. It doesn’t matter if this is your first experience in drug rehab or a repeat admission.
At Resurgence, we accept most major insurance carriers. We offer a free online insurance verification tool that can help get you started. If you have any questions our staff is waiting to take your call.
